proxima blue

Proxima Blue is half about me, half set in my world.

It’s blue, the same blue on the cover. There are weird steel beams like liquid metal, bright flashing lights in strange shapes like massive creatures flitting around. This song takes place on a plain of existence between earth and other. Limbo, my own personal limbo.

The hook looks like a strange God asking me the questions sung. It’s a woman, or at least a God in a female form. I’m struggling toward her, I can do it, but god is it difficult.

The first verse is about me. I feel an emptiness in my chest. I see a strange dungeon with vertical shackles and a metal chair in the centre. I smell blood and rot and bones and pain. All in a matter of seconds I feel a sense of release, the sense you get when you go ‘it’s fine I can always just end it.’ I feel anger in this section too, I already have it hard enough and there’s people who have the audacity to make it more difficult. The verse starts warping into the other world again. I feel cold water on my fingertips, but as if it were being felt in a dream. The atmospheric bridge is like floating and being brought back to your feet by the single note I sing. It’s like a tether. The final verse is in my world, a lot of the lyrics are references. It's a totally blue verse, with iridescent blue shards floating around. I do see an open field for some reason, but only for a second. It’s surrounded by trees and small mountains. Everything else in the song is quite wintery feeling. Cold yet alive. This section feels like a spirit taking your heart in its hands and breathing life back into it.

blueprint bones

This song is heavily based in my world.

We start in an underground lab bearing a pale blue and white colour palette. The walls of the lab are sterile but not in a scary way, in a ‘this place is inhabited by someone old and wise’ way. White walls and a strange bluish tinge to everything, most likely from the lights. Mist coats the floor but is barely noticeable. It’s cool inside. The white desk in the room is covered in blueprints and strange sigils, maps, scrolls etc. There are ancient look tomes everywhere, not befitting to a place like this, more befitting to a great library from centuries before. There’s a massive tank in the room, full of luminescent blue liquid… someone is floating in it. A woman. She is suspended in the liquid, suspended in the state of ‘Eflure Artillium.’ (I can’t elaborate on this one sorry folks). She’s naked, wires and tubes coming out of her body.

 It’s dead quiet inside. No smells or tastes perforate the surroundings.

I feel cold liquid hitting my veins and the mist licking my skin gently. The cacophony of voices at the end of the track are all failed clones, dead, but not without reason. They helped get to this point.

tomes

This story features two lovers. The start of the song is one of them warning the other not to venture into the mountain. The fast verse in the middle is the second persons monologue and inner thoughts, then he speaks to his lover. ‘You shouldn’t trust people like me, that’s how you get hurt.’ The end of the song is his lover again cementing his warning.

I see a misty mountain and a gloomy overcast sky. Weird bird calls, distant growls, and scuttling creatures. Soft dark earth, and a secret opening in the side of a rock face. A dark passageway leading downwards to old stone walls riddled with gold and lit by torches. A damp, dark room that looks like an ancient, primitive library. Shadowy figures dance around, barely in sight. Ancient tomes line the room. I smell the earth, the forest, the mossy corridors, and the torches when they light. I feel slick leaves hitting my face, the warmth of my lovers’ hand diminishing as I rip mine away. I taste my own sweat, I can feel my breath catch and my heart pound in my chest.

spirit gate

The day quickly turns to night, the sunset barely making an appearance as the sky is painted with an incredible galaxy seen only in one’s dreams.

Two figures stand in a field together, eyes filled with wonder and fixed on the masterpiece above them. Their hands locked together, sharing the fascination.

One of them, without knowing, has been allowing their seemingly broken heart to open to the man next to him. Here he stands, completely serene and comfortable with the other. They are together in this moment, and nothing else.

esoin

Esoin is one of my more real songs.

The more real a song is, the blurrier it can be in my mind, but this song is an exception. The brutality of life isn’t as beautiful as the fantasies I create… but at least the music I make about it is.

Esoin is a swirling pool of black tar highlighted with green toxins, the hole in which it writhes is surrounded by dark fragrant vegetation.

There’s a siren singing woefully, the voice vibrating in silver echoes across nothingness.

A dark figure is on its knees, head in hands, black dripping from its eyes onto the earth.

There is a blade, it elongates and thins down, sleek scarlet blood flowing down it.

A flock of raven’s circle in a miserable sky, slowly forming a void to parallel the one in the Earth.

It smells like alcohol. Rubbing alcohol and vodka.

blood moon

A shadowy figure slings one leg over a sleek, black motorcycle. The stench of petrol fumes hit the nose as they start the engine.

Under a dark, misty sky they disappear into the night.

Red flashing lights zip past their silhouette on the highway, gloved hands gripping the handles of their vehicle. Cold air thrashes their face, unsuccessful in bothering the rider.

 If they had a heartbeat, it would be pumping excitedly within their chest.

They approach an ancient looking cathedral, the higher you look the more it blends in with the sky due to the black sediment coating it.

 Snow begins falling from the sky as the figure advances forth … perhaps the sediment will be painted a new colour tonight.

The inside of the cathedral smells exactly like Boccanera by Orto Parisi. The scent of a rich, mysterious vampire is how it is best described. The figure pulls back their lips to reveal a set of well used fangs, advancing further into the structure.

 Upon reaching the centre of the cathedral, they gaze up at an ever-bloodying moon. It looms through a perfectly designed glass ceiling wrought with delicate iron embellishments. Sculpted within the iron are tales of beasts and creatures of the dark, rubies glinting in their metal skulls.

Dusty tapestries hang on the walls of the cathedral, flickering candles and burning incense giving light to the faded stories weaves upon them. The perfect combination of holy and unholy.

Blood moon:

eclipse

I very vividly see a scene like the opening of ‘Blade’ taking place in the cathedral. This is combined with the iconic scene I saw in Berghain. Essentially a bloody, gothic club scene highlighted by a massive Blood Moon.

Two figures dance together under the stark red moon, impossible to decipher who is mortal and who is not. Tracing each others lips with stiletto talons, completely intoxicated by the air, by eachother, by everything. Minds ablur from the indulgent substances running through their cold veins.